A relationship is a connection or association between two or more persons. It is how they behave and are involved with each other. They may be family, friends, colleagues or acquaintances. In this article, we will be dealing solely with intimate relationships, with emphasis on healthy relationships.
Nowadays, everyone is in a relationship or even two. From school kids to young and older adults, we are all in a relationship. Some of those in relationships don’t know what it means to be with someone, or why they should even be in a relationship. They feel tingles for the other person and boom they start talking about relationships. Within a few days or weeks of meeting, they are already together.
Types of Relationship
A healthy relationship involves trust, respect, honesty and other positive attributes. There’s no fear here and no imbalance of power. There’s love and fairness to each other.
Toxic relationships are also known as “unhealthy relationships.” This type of relationship is the reverse of a healthy relationship. There’s no honesty. It is one-sided, lacks genuine love and in general is a waste of time and feelings. They don’t support each other, always quarrel and there’s no fairness. There’s also an obvious fear or tension surrounding both partners, mainly because it’s one-sided.
Read also: Signs of a toxic relationship
Our main focus here is on the qualities of healthy relationships, so we won’t dwell on toxic relationships.
Qualities of a Healthy Relationship
There are a lot of qualities a healthy relationship should have. It has trust, honesty, mutual respect, and good communication. Let’s discuss seven of these qualities.
A healthy relationship is built on communication. Both partners sit and talk about whatever is going on with them instead of running off or giving the silent treatment. This quality is a virtue and it’s the greatest of all.
Most times, you don’t just talk about what’s going on in the relationship but also how to help each other with personal issues. Communication helps both parties explain what they are experiencing and what their needs are. It goes a very long way in saving the relationship.
Ever wonder why relationships built on friendships last longer than those which were not? Well here’s your answer. A friend is someone whose company you enjoy and you feel affection for. Friendship is the stage before dating that you shouldn’t skip.
When you’re friends with someone before dating, you find out your feelings and analyze them. The more you know them, the easier it’ll be to decide on going into a relationship with them. It saves you the stress of going through the talking stage as they were your friend before you started dating. It gives you more reasons as to why you should or shouldn’t date them. This quality mixed with positive communication is the rock on which you build a healthy relationship
Trust is the confidence in or reliance on a person. Trust helps in building a healthy relationship. It makes it easier to let the one you are in love with stay far without you feeling anxious. It makes it easier for you to give them space and still hold their hands tight.
Read also: How to manage long distance relationships
Trust refines the relationship and gives you the benefit of doubt. It also makes the relationship last longer. When there’s love and there’s trust, everything goes smoothly and freely. You don’t have to be scared about them cheating on you with anyone else. The power of trust in a healthy relationship is equivalent to that of a pillar in a house.
Respect for each other is another important quality of a healthy relationship. Both partners need to respect themselves. Respect makes it easier to see each other from a lighter point. It brings boundaries in, making them know they can trust each other and not invade each other’s space. It doesn’t necessarily mean they won’t fight or quarrel. After all, it’s part of the relationship too. It means that they give each other the love they deserve and also know when to step back.
Respect also means that you treat your spouse or partner thoughtfully and courteously. E.g. you do not engage in name-calling and do not insult or demean your spouse or partner. It is you considering your partner before making any decisions because it’s for the best of your relationship.
To forgive is to choose to pardon, waiver, or overlook any desire to punish or hold grudges. It is really important in a relationship as it stops negativity. Forgiveness makes it easier to get past any misunderstanding. It gives you more reasons to love your partner no matter what they did to hurt you.
It’s not easy to forgive, but forgiveness is therapeutic so you need to forgive your partner or spouse. You change your thoughts, feelings, desires and actions towards your partner. It helps you feel more positive. At that point, you don’t care if or not they’ve offended you, all you are keen on doing is redeeming your relationship.
Love is a feeling of affection. Healthy love feels like coming home every day to a place that brings you ease and confidence in yourself. It’s being able to trust your partner when everything else in your life is uncertain. Love makes you feel empowered when everything else seems to remind you that you’re falling short.
Healthy love feels like peace. It gives you and your partner a sense of satisfaction and refreshment. It comes in handy and it’s like having something stable even in an unstable world. For some people, it’s hard to find but when they find it, it gets addicting and it goes a long way in helping. Love boosts your mental health, gives you a special kind of glow, provides support to fight against everything and anything. True love is one of the ingredients for a healthy relationship and it’s really amazing. It’s an intense but amazing feeling.
To understand is to know, grasp sufficiently and believe in total. A healthy relationship cannot stand without understanding. In fact, experts say that love in a relationship cannot survive without understanding. It’s an essential quality in a relationship.
Understanding your partner gives them the benefit of doubts against all odds. It is trusting them on a different level. You love them even with their flaws, scars and dark side. You don’t care because you understand, you believe them in total and you’ve seen them microscopically and wouldn’t want to change them for anything in the world. It is one thing to love a person and it’s another thing to understand them.
Understanding creates the conditions for love. Without it, there’s no love. You see from their eyes and angles, and know what they can or cannot do. It takes you down the route of trust and it helps the relationship last longer. Understanding gives room for love and love shows you why you should keep the relationship going.
I hope the next time you get into a relationship, you would be more interested in understanding them than changing them. Always remember that trust, effective communication, friendship, mutual respect, forgiveness and love would help you keep a healthy relationship with your spouse. Make sure to always be on the lookout for these qualities and many others we weren’t able to talk about in this article.
Thanks for taking the time to read my article. Let me know what you think about it in the comments section.
- Mental health blogger